OWNERSHIP: Rum-sodden cattle stealers.

["Rodney Shakespeare" <Rodney.Shakespeare1@btopenworld.com>]

Dear All,
    A member of this list has just sent a short private email reproaching me for implying that good ole southern boys are rum-sodden cattle-stealers.

    Well, it's all the fault of one of my history teachers at school.  He always made us do maps -- it didn't matter how neat the map was, you only got full marks if all areas of the map were painted a special pink/red.  When you did that, he'd say, "Ah, m'boy, I see that you're maturing at last.  Ten out of ten.")

 

    Sometimes he'd look a bit depressed and would then suddenly blurt out that all southern Americans (yessir, all) are rum-sodden cattle stealers but he would then bite his lip and say no more.

 

    Well, one day, he was very, very depressed and he suddenly did say more.  He started to explain in great detail exactly why rum-sodden cattle-stealers steal cattle.

    I jumped up wearing my usual straw boater..  "Sir, sir, " I cried.  "That is going too far.  You will destroy international goodwill.  Desist!"

    And he did. 

 

    So now you all know that, at heart, I'm a decent fellow who is prepared to take a stand against people trying to make nasty insiuations about rum-sodden cattle stealers..

Rodney SShakespeare.